Falling or Flying
by Mariella Montgomery
Summary: Chapter-story mostly around Addison back in NY days, but with some changes from the original storyline. What will she do when she has to decide between two men? Read to find out more!
1. Prologue

Hey guys,

so I am back with a chapter story. I won't tell you much before you read this, because otherwise I would spoil the surpriese. ;)

Only a few things:

- the story is set back in NY days

- the title "Falling or Flying" is by Grace Potter & The Nocturanals

- I'm not Shonda, so I don't own anything

Now have fun and I'm looking forward to your reviews, because I'm pretty nervous, because the idea has been in my head for a time now.

Love Mariella

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><p><strong>Falling or Flying - Prologue<strong>

"Addison?"

Addison sighed. It wasn't him again. He had again sent his best friend. She went downstairs. "Hey." She told him quietly.

"I'm sorry …"  
>"He won't make it?" Addison sighed again when she saw him nodding, something was more important to her husband than the plans they had made weeks ago.<br>"No, he's stuck in a surgery."  
>"Oh, yeah, I see." She felt ridiculous, because she was already dressed up for the gala they wanted to attend.<br>"So, I know it's not the same, but we should go to this gala and … we could go together since you're already dressed and look great and I wear the suit you dragged me to buy a few weeks ago." He gave her his best smile.  
>Addison returned it softly and sadly. "Sure, we should go. I just grab my bag." She went upstairs again and sighed. She looked at her reflection. At least she looked really fabulous. She wore a dark purple knee long dress, which hugged her great body perfectly and matched her auburn hair perfectly. Why wasn't her husband looking at her? She smiled sadly. He had stood her up so many times in the last year. He always made sure, she wasn't left alone by sending his best friend, but that simply wasn't the same. Sure, she enjoyed spending the time with him and they came along now much better than they had when they first met, but still. She again had to go to the gala, smile and tell the people her husband didn't make it, because he was in surgery. She really hated this. She grabbed her bag and went downstairs. "Ok, so let's go."<p>

Hours later they arrived back at the brownstone.

"I know it wasn't the night you wished for, but …"  
>"I had fun, thanks."<br>He smiled at her. "Yes, me too."

"Will we go to the hospital tomorrow together?"  
>"Sure."<br>"You make coffee, I'll bring food for breakfast." He said grinning.

Addison smiled lightly. "Yeah, the other way round it would be no good for any of us."  
>"I still can't believe you're such a bad cook. I mean everyone can at least cook anything."<br>"Yeah, well …" She hit him lightly. "Don't judge. Maybe I am a miserable cook, but I can make really good coffee."  
>He grinned. "True. So I'll stop by for breakfast?"<p>

"Can't wait for it."

He leaned in and kissed her cheek. "Sleep well Addie."  
>"Sleep well Derek."<p>

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><p>So, what do you think? Who could be Addie's husband? Worth continuing? I know the prologue has been pretty short. ;) I'm really looking forward to your reviews. Thanks!<p> 


	2. Chapter 1

Hey guys,

thank you so much for your reviews to the last chapter.

I managed to finish my first chapter and I would be so happy if some more people reviewed, you would really make me happy and continue this story faster. ;) Also if you maybe have ideas, suggestions or something you would like to read in this story I'm really interested to hear it and will do my best to write it in the story if it fits with my ideas.

Disclaimer: I'm not Shonda, so I still don't own anything.

Love Mariella

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><p><strong>Falling or Flying – Chapter 1<strong>

*** 3 month later ***

"Dr. Montgomery-Sloan?" An intern approached Addison. Addison looked up from her chart. "Yes?"

"Ahmm … your husband is still in surgery, he told me to give you this and say that he's sorry." Addison smiled at the young woman, so seemed terrified. "Thank you."  
>She walked to her office and read the note.<p>

_Addie,_

_I'm sorry, I won't make it tonight, but I talked to Derek. He'll pick you up at 8 pm._

_Have a nice evening._

_Love Mark_

Addison sighed. He stood her up again and again he sent Derek. She shrugged her head and went home. Two hours later she looked at the mirror. She had planned this for weeks and made sure Mark remembered it, but now he stood her up again and sent Derek over to go on a date with her.

She heard the bell ring and opened the door. Derek stood in front of it. He smiled at her. "I know I'm not the one you hoped for, but … you're ready?" He couldn't deny it, she looked so beautiful, how could Mark stand her up so often. So many people would have been lucky to have someone like Addison waiting for them at home. He would be happy to have Addison waiting for him at home. He noticed that he was starting to fall for her.

Addison smiled at him and kissed his cheek. He looked good. "Sure. Thanks you're coming with me, I would have felt really sorry if I bought the tickets for nothing."

*** another 3 months later ***

Addison looked at the set table. Everything was ready only her husband was missing. She felt like crying. He had forgotten their anniversary. She felt tears welling up again. She grabbed her mobile. "Derek? Can you come over? Please!"  
>Derek sighed. "Sure. I'll be there in a few." He got ready to leave his apartment. He had seen Addison a lot of times sad the last year, but today it seemed be really bad. He looked at the date and noticed it was Addison's and Mark's anniversary. He had forgotten. He felt anger boiling up. He had tried to tell Mark that he was being a jerk for around the last year, but he wasn't listening. The problem was he was falling for Addison. He knew it, he has been for a while. He had liked her, when they were in med school, but Mark met her first and they were best friends, so she was off limits. Before he approached the brownstone he got some flowers for her. Finally he arrived and rang the bell. Addison opened him and he hugged her. She let him enter. "I brought you some flowers."<br>"Thanks." She took them and got in the kitchen to get a vase and put them in it. He could tell she has been crying.

"I also brought some alcohol." He said grinning, which made Addison smile a little and they moved into the living room. Derek poured her and himself some liquid. They didn't talk for a while.

"He has forgotten me." She finally told him.

"He didn't forget you."

"He's never home."  
>"Oh Addison, he's just busy and …"<br>"But you are one of the best neurosurgeons and you still make it."

Derek didn't know what to say. He simply hugged her and kissed her temple. Addison looked up at him. He had been much more a husband than Mark has been in a while. She couldn't stop looking at him and cuddled closer to him. It should feel wrong to be so close to him, but it didn't. Derek barely could breath, when Addison pulled her as close as possible. They looked at each other for a long while, before they both leaned in and no one could later say, who kissed whom first, but it happened. Their lips touched, first softly and sweet, but soon the kiss started to become more passionate and their tongues started to tangle each other. Derek pulled back, which took all his willpower. "Addison, we shouldn't …"

"Don't talk so much …"  
>Derek groaned and they kissed each other again. Short time later Addison pulled back. "Upstairs." She whispered huskily and Derek skipped her in his arms, which made her giggle and they went upstairs.<p>

Mark came home late. He entered the brownstone and saw a jacket lying by the stairs. He picked it up, it wasn't his, but it was so damn familiar. He went upstairs, but when he entered the bedroom he stood in shock. He found his wife and best friend in bed … together. Addison stared at him in shock and when Derek noticed that Addison froze, he turned around and saw Mark standing in the doorframe.

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><p>Pretty please review! :D<p> 


	3. Chapter 2

Hey guys,

thank you for your reviews to the last chapter.

I finally finished the next one. I hope you'll like it.

Disclaimer: I still don't own anything

Love Mariella

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><p><strong>Falling or Flying – Chapter 2<strong>

"What exactly do you think you're doing?" Mark screamed furious at Derek.

"Mark, let me …" Addison started.

"Explain?" Mark spat. "Don't. I can see exactly what's going on here."  
>Addison crinkled. True, she had been lonely the last time, but she didn't plan to cheat on her husband or anything like this. Mark stormed out of the room. She looked at Derek. "You should go." She told him calmly.<p>

"Addie, …"

"No, go!" She quickly got dressed and went after Mark.

"Mark!" He was already downstairs, when he turned around. "Don't talk to me!"

"I'm sorry."  
>"To be sorry isn't enough Addison!"<br>"I know. He was … he was just here, I know this is what is said all the time, but it's the truth."  
>"You screwed my best friend in OUR bed and all you say is he was just here."<p>

Tears were rolling down her cheeks. "Mark, please. We have to talk about this."  
>"No, we don't. I don't want to see you. We're over Addison!"<p>

"But …"  
>He turned around. "Don't try to call me or anything, because I won't pick up."<p>

"We can survive this." She told him in tears.

"There isn't an "us" anymore." He told her when he left the brownstone. Addison sank down in tears.

*** 3 days later ***

Derek sighed. He stood at the nurse station at Mt. Sinai. He hadn't heard anything from Addison since the night Mark left. He looked up, when he heard the sound of familiar heels. Addison was coming down the hall. He smiled at her slightly. "Hey." He told her.

"Dr. Shepherd." She only told him and went to the attending locker room. Derek was wired. He went after her. "Since when are we on last names again?"

Addison didn't look at him and simply went on with making herself ready for her shift.

Derek sighed. He knew she felt terrible. He felt it too. He hated the way the both of them betrayed Mark, but also he couldn't forget her kisses. How he enjoyed it. How he didn't want anything more than that she kissed him again. "Addie, I know you feel terrible about …"  
>"No, you don't! He isn't answering my calls, my e-mails or text messages."<p>

"I lost my best friend too!" Derek told her impatiently.

Addison looked at him for the first time. "I … I am sorry."  
>"It's ok. Listen, I know you feel terrible, but also it wasn't good before. Mark was making you unhappy the last year."<br>"I …"  
>"Don't deny it, because we both know it's true and … I fell for you. I didn't notice at the beginning, but it's true. I love you Addison."<br>"Derek …"

"I know you're still hurt, but … give us a chance. We have fun together and you like me. Give me a chance to prove my love for you."

"I think I'll need some time."  
>Derek nodded. "I understand, but go out with me. Tonight."<p>

"I can't."  
>"Why?"<br>"Because …" But she couldn't really tell him, why they couldn't go out.  
>"Because isn't an answer. Just a nice dinner. I know you always wanted to go to this new French restaurant."<br>Addison sighed. "Fine." A dinner wouldn't hurt, would it? She had tried everything to contact her husband, but obviously he didn't want to talk to her.

"I'll pick you up at 8?"

"Sounds good."  
>He smiled at her and kissed her temple. "I'm looking forward to it."<p>

*** 3 months later ***

Addison and Derek were doing fine. Actually they were doing really great. Addison smiled at Derek, who was lying in the bed next to her. Maybe it was time to let Mark go. They hadn't been happy for a long time and with Derek things seem to brighten up.

Derek smiled at her, when he woke up. "Hey gorgeous." He kissed her softly.  
>"Hey Derek." She smiled softly at him.<p>

"How are you?"  
>"Good, I like it in bed, it's comfy."<br>Derek grinned at her. "It is." He cuddled her closer and kissed her again. "We could stay in bed."  
>Addison smiled. "As tempting as this sounds, I have to get up soon, because I have this important case …"<br>"A case is more important than I am?" Derek made his best fake hurt face.

"Oh come on, you're a surgeon too… but I could make it up to you tonight." Addison said smirking.

Derek grinned widely. "Hmmm … I really like the sound of that."

The day had gone smoothly and Derek waited for Addison in the entrance hall. Addison came up to him. "Hey stranger."  
>"Addie." He leaned in and kissed her. "So I was thinking that we maybe could have dinner before you make the morning up to me?"<br>"Sounds like a good idea. Where are we going?"

"Home. I'll cook for you."

"Hmm … I like it when you cook."  
>"You do. Any chance you cook some time for me too?"<br>Addison looked at him." You don't want this."  
>"You can't be THAT bad."<p>

"I am. The last time I tried to cook I nearly sat the kitchen on fire."  
>Derek smirked. "Yeah, some people like it hot."<br>Addison rolled her eyes and hit him playfully. "Not funny!" He leaned in again and grabbed her by her wrist to kiss her intensely.

"So, Richard called today." Addison told Derek while they were eating.

"What did he want?"  
>"He told me that he will get a TTTS at SGH tomorrow."<p>

"He wants you to come?"  
>"Yes."<br>"Do you want to go?"

"Mark is in Seattle."  
>Derek looked at Addison. "Do you want to go?"<br>"I … don't know. I don't feel like I could face Mark, but I am one of the less people, who can do this surgery, so I should go."

"I will come with me."

"No, you."  
>"Listen Addie, this isn't only your fault. You shouldn't have to face him alone."<p>

"Derek…"  
>"Addison, I love you. I love you so much." He leaned in and kissed her. "Let me go with you and be there for you."<br>Addison thought for a while, then she nodded. " Fine. Maybe it's a good thing to have you there and I have to give him divorce papers too."  
>Derek nodded and kissed her temple. "I'll be there for you, whatever you need. I can only listen as a friend or do other things."<p>

Addison smiled softly at him. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

The next day Addison and Derek left for Seattle. They entered SGH at late afternoon.

Mark was just about to end his shift, when he noticed a flash of familiar hair. He looked again and saw that it was Addison.

Derek smiled at her. "You're ok?"

"Not completely, but I'll get there."

Derek grabbed her by her wrist and pulled her into a loving kiss. "Everything will be fine."

"Isn't this a happy couple?" They heard a sarcastic voice and turned around. Mark was standing in front of them. Addison looked at him shocked. "You're here."

"I am, but the better question is, why are you here."  
>"You got a TTTS this morning and Richard called me and asked me if I operate."<p>

"Ok, but what is HE" He pointed at Derek. "Doing here?"

Addison looked uncomfortable. Derek had her still grabbed by her wrist. "Moral support." Derek answered Mark.

Mark laughed. "Yeah, sure. As if she would need it. She had done the operation before"

Derek shrugged. "I know that, but I wanted to go with her, because unless you I really care about her."

Mark laughed. "This is really … unbelievable. You're really a couple?"  
>He looked between them. "We are." Derek told them and grabbed Addison closer.<p>

"This is MY WIFE you ass!" Mark screamed at Derek. He was damn angry when he only thought about Addison and Derek together, but actually see them nearly killed him. He punched Derek in the middle of his face.

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><p>Pretty please review.<p> 


	4. Chapter 3

Hey guys,

I know I wanted to finish my GA-chapter story "Is it love" first, but I got this idea for this story, so I worked on the next chapter and it was done in no time.

I really hope you will enjoy it and even though there wasn't an update in a long time read it and I would be so happy for reviews.

Love Mariella

Disclaimer: I don't own anything!

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><p><strong>Falling or Flying – Chapter 3<strong>

_Mark laughed. "This is really … unbelievable. You're really a couple?!"_  
><em>He looked between them. "We are." Derek told them and grabbed Addison closer.<em>

_"This is MY WIFE you ass!" Mark screamed at Derek. He was damn angry when he only thought about Addison and Derek together, but actually see them nearly killed him. He punched Derek in the middle of his face._

Addison looked at Mark. She was shocked. "You're really … unbelievable." She glared at him, before she went to Derek and looked at his face. "Come on, we should stitch you up."  
>"I could do that myself, if you …"<br>Addison looked at him and rolled her eyes. "Sure, sure. Let's go." She glared once more at Mark and then left with Derek on their way to find something to stitch him up, she met an intern. "Excuse me Dr …?"

"Stevens."  
>"Ok, Dr. Stevens, I need something to stitch him up." She pointed at Derek.<p>

Izzie looked at her confused. "Ahm … here are Doctors that can stitch him up."  
>"I am a doctor."<p>

"Maybe, but …"  
>"I am Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery and I am here, because Chief Webber asked me to come out here for an important case, so I am pretty sure I can stitch him up myself."<br>Izzie looked at her shock. This woman was Addison Montgomery?! She was her great idol, the one that had brought her through med school. "I am sorry Dr. Montgomery, I will show you where to go."  
>Addison smiled at her. "Thanks."<p>

Short time later Izzie left Derek and Addison alone and Addison started to stitch Derek up. "You know you can be quiet scary sometimes."  
>"I didn't want to discuss with this intern about me stitching you up."<br>"You're "I am Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery" speech was quiet amusing."

"Haha … don't move so much or I will hurt you and that would totally ruin my reputation." Addison smiled at Derek.  
>Meanwhile Izzie were running to her follow interns. "You will never guess, who I just met."<p>

Christina looked at her. "I don't think I care."  
>Izzie smirked. "You will."<br>"Tell us Iz." George told her.

"Ok, so I was just walking down the floor when I met a woman with a man, who needed to be stitched up and she asked me where she could do that and then I told her that we have capable doctors for that and she told me she's a doctor too." Izzie made a break.

"Oh come on Izzie, who's she?!" Meredith asked her, now interested.

"Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery."  
>Christina now looked at her. "What?!"<br>"I just met Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery."  
>"Why is she here?"<br>"For the TTTS I guess." Christina said. "She's one of the less people, who can do that. I have to be at her case!"

"No way!" Izzie told her. "I will be her intern." They looked at each other, before they started to run.

Addison had finished to stitch Derek up. "As good as new."

"Thanks." He pulled her into an embrace.

"I'm sorry for that." Addison told her referring to the reason, why the stitching up was needed.

"It's not your fault." Derek pulled her into an embrace and kissed her hair softly.  
>"You know as good as me that he only hit you because of me." Addison told him quietly. To be hold by him made her much calmer.<p>

"Yes, but it's worth it. So let's go and see Richard and then went back to the hotel?!"

"Ok, sounds like a good plan."

The next day Addison entered SGH and went to Dr. Burke to get an intern. Short time later the blonde doctor from the day before approached Addison. "Dr. Montgomery?" Addison turned around. "I am your intern today." Addison looked at the younger woman. "Then let's go Dr. Stevens."

After they left the patient's room of Addison's patient Izzie was amazed, she really could work with her today. In this moment Mark Sloan appeared. "Addison!" Izzie looked at him, he seemed to know her, but Addison didn't show anything like that. Mark went over to them. "Addison!" Finally she looked up. "What do you want?"

"This isn't quiet a nice greeting."

Addison rolled her eyes. "Good morning. What do you want?"

"Addison, we …" He then noticed that Izzie was still standing next to Addison. He smiled his best smile at her. "Would you excuse us for a moment Dr. Stevens? I want to talk to my wife in private."

Izzie looked confused from one to another. Mark Sloan was married? He was kidding, right?! Mark Sloan MARRIED! No, that could never happen and married to Addison Montgomery?! Things were really starting to get confusing here.

"This isn't necessary Dr. Stevens." Addison told her. Then she looked at Mark. "I have nothing I want to tell you. Let's go Stevens!"

She turned around, but Mark called after her. "Didn't you bring Derek today?"

Addison swirled around. "You have no right to judge."  
>"No?"<br>"No, you don't have and don't even start this."  
>"You cheated on me!" Addison moved closer to him. "Great Mark, thanks, I am so grateful that now the whole hospital knows. I'm here to do an operation. This has nothing to do with you."<p>

Mark groaned. "You knew I was here?!" He looked at her closely. "Of course you knew."  
>"Yes, Richard told me. Look, I'm quite busy right now … and actually there is one thing we have to discuss, but not right now." Before Mark could say anything Addison left with Izzie.<p>

At lunch Izzie sat down with Meredith, Christina, George and Alex.

"So, how's work with Dr. Montgomery?" Christina asked Izzie jealous.

Izzie shrugged. "It's good. She's a great doctor." She was thinking if she should tell the others about the incident with Mark Sloan earlier, but it seemed like Dr. Montgomery was very uncomfortable by it and so she kept it to herself at least for now.

After lunch Izzie went back to the NICU. She saw Addison standing in front of the babies. She went over to her. "They are quite comforting, a lot of people come here."  
>Addison didn't say anything for a while. "So I guess by now the whole hospitals knows that I'm Mark Sloan's cheating wife."<br>Izzie looked at her. "I don't think any nurse was around and I didn't tell anybody."  
>Addison looked at her surprised. "You didn't? But it would have been some really good gossip."<p>

"Maybe, but I'm not too much interested in that."  
>Addison looked at her. "Thanks, this is really … nice."<p>

"I owed you."  
>Addison looked at her confused. "How could you owe me? We only met each other yesterday."<p>

"Every time in med school I was about to give up I read one of your articles and it made me go on."

Addison smiled. "This is the nicest compliment I ever got."  
>Izzie blushed a little bit. "Thanks. So …"<p>

"You wanna know why my husband is in Seattle probably whoring around and I am in New York right?"  
>Izzie smiled at her. "Only if you want to talk about it."<p>

Addison looked at Izzie for a while. Was she really telling this intern all of her private stuff? She didn't know why, but she liked Izzie and since she didn't tell anyone about her by now meant something. Also she needed to tell someone about it, what was inside her for such a long time. She talked to Derek about it, but it wasn't the same and her other friends back in NY … she didn't tell them, because she felt terrible to tell them, because the knew Mark AND her and she didn't want them to take sides. So maybe telling someone, who didn't really know Derek, Mark, her and their situation at all was a good start, so she started. "Since you didn't tell anybody about earlier I think I owe you now. Mark and I … we met in med school. I met Derek, the guy I stitched together yesterday, back then too. He was Mark's best friend until he left NY. They know each other since kindergarten. Mark asked me out in med school and I agreed. Everything was perfect." Addison looked at the infant in front of her for a while before continuing. "We dated and got married before we started internship. We finished internship, residency and fellowships together. Derek, Mark and me, we were a good team back then and Derek became a great friend for me too, but then … Mark stopped coming home, he took more surgeries, stayed in the hospital and started to become absent. He sent Derek over all the time. For galas we wanted to attend, shows or movies we wanted to watch, the holidays and even my birthdays and our anniversaries." She whipped little tears from her eyes. "Mark and me, we grow apart more and more, when Derek and I started to become closer. It was the night of our 10th anniversary and Mark didn't show up, I was so hurt and angry and I called Derek to come over. I didn't want it to happen. We didn't plan it to happen, but it happened. I cheated on my husband and he found us in bed and I thought my heart was ripped out. He left the night and I … I continued to go to work, but avoided Derek, but he found me one day and was saying all the perfect things. I agreed to go out with him and things … they were becoming better, I started to feel like myself again, no small and powerless like the last years, but confident like I used to be with a man by my side, who supports me. I hated that my marriage with Mark should end like this, but I think it's beyond repair. We hurt each other too badly. We loved each other so much, but this was a long time ago and I think it's best for the both of us to move on. I hate that it is with his best friend, but … I really love Derek."

Izzie listened to Addison quietly. She felt with her, when Addison told her everything. "A husband should be there for his wife and support her." She told Addison after she finished.

"Yeah, he should. But again, a wife shouldn't cheat on her husband. She shouldn't fall for his best friend and act on her feelings."

"Dr. Montgomery …"

"Please, call me Addison. After you know all of this about me, Addison seems appropriate."

"Then it's Izzie for you." Izzie told her, which made Addison smile. "Addison, it wasn't right to cheat on him and I won't tell you that it's ok, but you did it for a reason. He stopped noticing you and no one should be treated like this. He also screwed about half the nurses here by now."

"Yeah, because he's hurt and I never wanted to hurt him like this, but … I did and as much it hurts me to admit it, I fell out of love with my own husband, so I think it's the best to end it."

Izzie nodded. "Have you told him already?"

"No, but I will, today, so it would be nice if you kept it quiet until then."

"I won't tell anyone a word about what you told me, ever."

"Thanks." Addison smiled at Izzie. "So, everything is prepared and we will operate tomorrow. I assume that you will assist then."

"I would be honored." Izzie smiled at her.

"Good, end your shift in time, because we'll have a long day tomorrow. Page me when anything happens, because I'm off for today."

"Sure. See you tomorrow Addison."

"See you tomorrow Izzie." Addison smiled at the intern and left the intern. She went to Mark's office. There was an hour left, before Derek wanted to pick her up. She knocked and heard a "Come in.". She pushed the door open carefully, stepped in and closed the door again. "Can I talk to you?" She asked him, after they stood there for a while in silence. Mark still looked mad at her, but gestured at the chair across his table. She sat down and took a deep breath. This wouldn't be an easy talk.

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><p>Pretty please review. 3<p> 


	5. Chapter 4

Hey guys,

next chapter is done. :D I am really inspired for this story this week. I also decided on a lengths for this one, it will be around 8 chapters.

So have fun reading and I would be so happy if you reviewed. Thanks!

Love Mariella

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

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><p><strong>Falling or Flying - Chapter 4<strong>

Addison sat in front of Mark for a while, not knowing how to start. "So, are you starting to talk or will we only sit here in silence?"

"Mark, I …" Addison looked at him. "I'm sorry for what happened back in New York."

"You brought Derek here with you. DEREK, Addison! The one you cheated with. It doesn't seem like you're exactly sorry!"

"Mark, he wanted to come here with me."

"Since when do you care what anyone wants to except you!"

"Mark, that's not true!" Addison looked at him. "Look, I really hope you'll believe it that I'm sorry for how things ended back in New York. We loved each other so much once upon a time, but the last two years … we grew apart."

"Addison, we were busy. We became the best in our fields."

"Yes, you, Derek and me, we all became the best in our fields, but Derek and I still managed to have some free time, while you were taking all extra shifts and operations you could get." Addison told him silently.

"Addison, that's just … did you ever love me or did you want Derek from the beginning and only went out with me, because I asked you first?"

"Mark, don't say that!"

"Why? Because it's true."

"It's not true. I loved you so much and back in med school, Derek was only your best friend and I would never in a million years have thought to start anything with him and not only because he was your best friend, but because I was head over heels in love with you, but you were absent Mark! Not only for a few weeks or months, I could deal with that, but you were absent for two years and sent Derek over all the time! He went to all the galas, shows, movies with me. He was there for holidays, birthdays and even our freaking anniversary! He was there Mark and I will never say that I wasn't wrong by cheating on you, because it was, but he became more a husband to me than you were!"

"Oh come on Addison, that's a foul excuse! He was there?! That's your explanation? You fucked my best friend, because he was THERE!" Mark told her angry.

"Mark … not because he was there this night, but because he was there all the time. He was there to celebrate the important things with me, he held me, when I was crying, he was there when I was happy or sad. He was there for my important surgeries. When was the last time, you watch me in surgery? I always was there for your important surgeries and before things started to fell apart, you were there for me too."

"Seriously Addison, you're unbelievable. Maybe I wasn't there a lot in the last time, but that doesn't give you the right …"

"Don't you think, I don't know that? I do! I never wanted to turn out like my dad, but obviously I am! I am the cheater! So let's pick on Addison, because she deserves it!" Addison told him angry, but she couldn't stop tears from falling.

Mark sighed, he hated to see her cry. "Addison …"

"Please, don't." She stood with the back towards him. "I really hope, you can forgive me one day and I even more hope you can forgive Derek, because he misses you as his best friend. He doesn't say so, but I know it, I can see it in his eyes." Addison told him quietly.

Mark sighed. He was so angry at her, but at the same time, he knew she had a point, he had been absent and had sent Derek over. "Yeah, I hope so too."

Addison nodded and put papers out of her bag an laid them down on his desk. Mark looked at her confused. "Divorce papers." She told him silently. "Our lawyer took a look at it already, but you can call him, if you don't believe me. I signed them already. I'm sorry for what happened."

Mark looked at her stunned, he didn't expect her to ask him for the divorce. "You're serious about that?"

Addison looked at him. "What were you expecting? I thought you couldn't wait to come out of this marriage as quick as possible."

"You're not even trying to work it out?" Mark accused her.

"We weren't working for a long time Mark. Even before I cheated, we weren't working anymore. I loved you so, when we got married, but right now … I don't think there is anything left to work on it."

Mark looked at her for a while before he realized it. "You're in love with him!" Addison didn't look at him. "Addison! Look at me and tell me what I'm thinking is not true! Tell me that you're only with him, because you hated to have your marriage thrown away for nothing."

Addison looked up at Mark. "I'm sorry Mark, but I am."

"Out! Out here, now!" He screamed at her and before Addison could say anything more, she was kicked out by Mark.

She called Derek to tell him to meet him back at the hotel. Half an hour later she entered their suite at the Archfield. Derek smiled at her softly and kissed her, but noticed something was off.

"You ok? Something wrong with your patient?"

"I talked to Mark."

"You know, you didn't have to do this on your own, I could have come with you. At least the situation we're in is as much as my fault as it is yours."

"But you weren't the married one."

"But I was the one, who fell first. Who fell so hard for you Addison and even though I knew, I continued to come over and didn't stop you, when you were sad and we kissed."

Addison took his face in her hands. "Derek, listen. I was sad, yes, and I won't deny that, but I knew I was doing, you weren't taking advantage or anything. Understood?" Derek nodded. "So, how did things with Mark go?"

"Not too good. I think he was a bit taken aback that I brought divorce papers with me. He asked me if I am in love with you and when I couldn't tell him I'm not, he kicked me out."

"Sorry for that."

"Not your fault."

"I love you Addison. So much." Derek kissed her softly.

"I love you too."

"What do you think about staying in tonight, order room service and watch an old movie?"

"Sounds perfect." She smiled at him, when he carried her to the bed, ordered room service and cuddled close to her. "So, what movie do you want to watch?"

The next morning Addison went to SGH to perform the surgery. Izzie was excited about it. During surgery Addison noticed that Derek was sitting at the gallery. She smiled up at him and continued to operate. They only had one minor scare, but except that everything went pretty perfect. After she had left the or, she turned to Izzie. "You did good in there."

Izzie looked at Addison in awe. "Seriously?! You tell me I did good, when you were an God in there."

Addison smiled at the young intern. "Thanks even though I'm not God. Izzie, I'm telling you now something. I know you only started your internship here in Seattle and it's a great program. Normally I wouldn't say that, but you're talented for my speciality. I would like to teach you, but I won't stay here. Mt. Sinai has a pretty great program too."

"Are you …"

"I'm only telling you."

"But internship only started and switching is difficult …"

"Believe me, switching shouldn't be a problem. You could start in Mt. Sinai in no time, if it's what you want."

"You're saying that, because every hospital would love to have you."

"Yeah, maybe, but I also know that chief Roberts in Mt. Sinai wouldn't deny me if I asked him to hire an intern, who is talented. Think about it. You could take a look at Mt. Sinai if you want to. Give me a call, if you need anything." Addison smiled at the intern.

After Derek saw that Addison had left the or, he stood up and wanted to leave the gallery too, to get her some coffee and tell her how well she did, when he noticed someone standing at the entrance. Mark. "Hey Mark." Derek told him quietly.

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><p>Pretty please review. 3<p> 


	6. Chapter 5

Hey guys,

my next chapter is finished. :D

I hope you'll enjoy it and I would be so happy if you reviewed.

Love Mariella

Disclaimer: I (still) don't own anything.

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><p><strong>Falling or Flying - Chapter 5<strong>

When Mark didn't reply anything Derek continued. "She was pretty great in there."

"Wasn't she always?" Mark told him sarcastically.

"Look Mark, I don't want to fight with you."

"Too bad Derek, because fighting is what happens when you sleep with your best friend's wife."

"Mark …"

"Derek seriously, you have no right! I hate you and I hate to talk to you."

"Mark …" Derek sighed. "Neither Addison nor I planned what happened, it simply …"

"Happened? Seriously, that's the worst excuse ever. I trusted you! I sent you over because I trusted you, because I trusted your judgment that you knew what was right and what was wrong and that you would never betray my trust." Mark screamed at him angry.

Now it was Derek's turn to be angry. "Mark listen, I never planned this, but you sent me over all the time! Addison wasn't happy, I think I have never seen her more upset or unsure since we know her. She doesn't deserve this! She deserves someone, who loves her, who makes time, who listens to her and who is there, no matter what."

"And you believe that you are this person?" Mark looked at him challenging.

"Yes, actually I do. I know I am this person for her, because she's the love of my life." Derek told him sincerely.

"You know that she wants to divorce me to be with you?!"

"Yes, she told me."

"You encouraged her with that." Mark looked at Derek.

"I won't say that I'm sad that she decided to give us a try, but I'm sorry your marriage is over."

"Yeah, as if …" Mark told him sarcastically. "You screwed my wife and say you're sorry that my marriage is over. Don't lie! You always wanted to be with her. Now she decided to be with you … but know what Derek, I hope it will be you that will come home one day and find her in bed with another guy and hopefully he will be one of your friends!"

"Mark, seriously, we knew we were wrong, but don't play the innocent husband here, because this was partly your fault as well!"

"My fault? Seriously Derek?!"

"Yes, what did you think how long she would wait for you alone at home? Have you looked at Addison lately Mark? She is the hot girl! She was back in med school and she still is. She's Addison Forbes Montgomery and she would never let anyone do this to her at least not for very long."

Mark shrugged his head. "I don't want to see or talk to you. Neither you nor Addison. Simply go back to New York and never come here again!"

"Mark, we were never here to make you miserable. Addie only came here for the TTTS."

Mark didn't look at Derek and went out of the gallery. "Since she is finished by now, I bet you'll be gone by tomorrow evening. Tell her I'll send the divorce papers to the lawyer."

Derek sighed. He knew he had hurt Mark badly and he never planned to fall for Addison or act on his feelings, but it happened and it was too late now for going back. He grabbed some coffee for Addison and entered the attending's locker room. She was just getting changed in her clothes from the morning. She stood only in her underwear. Derek grabbed her from behind, which scared her first, but when she noticed it was him, she leaned in and they stood there for a while. Derek kissed her softly, not turning her around, before Derek spoke again. "You were brilliant in there." Derek whispered in her ear.

She smiled softly at him. "Thanks." She turned around, so that she faced him. He held the coffee out for he and she took it with a small smile. When she took a first sip, he took her in. She looked stunning. "You look so amazing honey."

She gave him a cocky smile. "I know there was a reason why I kept you around."

"Only to give you compliments? I hate to break it to you, but I'm pretty amazing in some other things as well." He grinned at her.

She smiled at him, but then her face turned serious. "You know, you really are."

They stood there for a while, before Derek spoke up again. "You know, as much as I enjoy the view. Let's get home, because I planned our evening and we'll be late if we don't leave soon."

"We're in Seattle."

"Yeah, but I had time, so I planned the evening out for us."

Addison smiled at him softly. "You know, I love it when you plan the evening out for us."

"I promise you I'll never stop doing that."

"I really hope so." She told him, while getting fully dressed.

"Come on, let's leave."

They left together and had a nice evening, first dinner then dancing and when they were back at their hotel they had amazing sex.

They were lying close to each other after and Derek was caressing Addison's hair. "I talked to Mark earlier."

"Wow, I didn't know you could kill the mood so easily."

"Sorry Addie, I didn't want to ruin the night, but I thought you should know, before you enter the hospital tomorrow." Derek sighed, which was reflected by Addison's sigh.

"Yeah, probably a good idea. I guess it wasn't just nice small talk?!"

"Not exactly, but what did you expect?! He's hurt and angry. He will come around."

"How do you know?"

"Because he always came around for you and he wants you to be happy, even though he might not see it now. Both of you weren't happy in your marriage. Give him some time and space, he'll come around."

Addison nodded, but didn't say anything more. Derek sighed. "Addie, look at me please." She lifted her head so that he could look her straight in the eyes. "You weren't happy. What we did .. it was wrong, but I don't regret it, because I love you, because for me it has been you since Mark drifted away. Do you remember the day we went out to the zoo and you stood like half an hour in front of the penguins?" She nodded silently. "You grabbed my hand and showed me and told me about them and I remembered that I haven't seen you that happy in weeks. I noticed that I missed your smile and swore myself that I would try my best to make you smile more, to give you happy memories from each day. I finally admitted that I had fallen for you. From that day on I knew you were the one."

"Really? Me talking about penguins?"

"What can I say. It's super sweet when you talk about penguins."

Addison smiled at him. "You know only little girls say ‚super sweet'."

"And me and you love me for it." Derek told her grinning.

Addison looked at him for a while before answering. "You know, I really do."

Derek cuddled her close. "We'll figure the rest out tomorrow honey and now sleep. It's rather late."

Addison snuggled into him. "Ok, sleep well and sweet dreams."

"With you by my side I always have the sweetest dreams." Derek told her grinning, before kissing her goodnight.

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><p>Pretty please review. 3<p> 


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